6-1-16 Canvas

 •Canvas• 

I've fallen in love with what others have painted me into 

From the baby hairs that stick out of my scalp to the stained nail polish toe nails on my feet 

I unwrap myself like a birthday present to someone I barely know 

The folds on my arms to the birth marks on my cheeks, I let them know I can be special 

I cover the parts of me I know I should show 

I lock them away into the spaces in between my fingers 

I show the parts of me I know I should hide 

I lay them out across my stomach all the way up to stand on my lips 

I am my own victim 

I paint my eyes and burn my hair so I can feel real

I cloak myself in bright colors to seal my pale skin 

But somedays when I've run out of time to put on a mask 

I stare into my painted mirror and I don't recognize my hair 

I don't recognize my circles

Yet, instead of feeling material, I feel authentic 

I am my own canvas 

I paint my bones different shades of orange and my veins so blue it's like hugging the ocean 

My skin is a bright pink 

Miles and miles of green strike my face 

My hair dances in the light air 

I've fallen in love with what people think of me 

Someone who loves the color of the veins and bones that I painted 

Not just the figure or my reflection 

They will fall in love with a canvas not a mask 

Even so 

I've made more masks than paintings

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